WAYPOSTS
A TRAIL GUIDE FOR DISCIPLING THE GENERATIONS
Biblical authors frequently used the metaphor of a trail or path to describe a life of following God.
David wrote, “Make me to know your ways, O LORD; teach me your paths.” (Psalm 24:4)
His son Solomon told his sons, “I have taught you the way of wisdom; I have led you in paths of uprightness.” (Proverbs 4:11)
Jesus Himself said, “the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction…The gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life.” (Matthew 7:13-14)
So, it’s fitting to think of the life of a child as a spiritual trail—one which they need help navigating. There are important turns that need to be made at certain points along the way. “Way-posts” are the signs that help trail-goers identify those turns so that they don’t wander off into danger.
As we’ve envisioned the trail of spiritual development from infancy to adulthood, we’ve identified six wayposts, which can help us steer children toward a full understanding of the gospel and a life of following Christ. In this booklet, you’ll be pointed to each of those wayposts—along with some practical suggestions and important texts to guide your steps.
If our children are to make it to the end of this trail safely, it will not be because they were so daring or because we were so wise. It will be a work of the Spirit. Yet, as “forward scouts in the wilderness of time,” we do bear a responsibility to help guide and point them in the right direction.
Our hope is that these wayposts will be helpful for you in other ways beyond the discipleship of children. It may be helpful for you in the discipleship of new believers, or it may be helpful for you to evaluate your own spiritual walk. Perhaps you missed part of the trail going up, or maybe you took a shortcut. Every Christian would benefit from walking down this trail again.
Learn about each of the six wayposts below…
Waypost 1: Incubate
The safety of the gospel
In Psalm 91, the psalmist memorably describes God as a “shelter,” “refuge,” and “fortress.” But then he makes a surprising comparison. He compares God’s love for His children to that of a mother (or father) bird who spreads her wings over her babies. It’s a moving picture of parental protection that is tender, yet strong.
In the gospel, we are granted the right to become children of God. Through the life, death, and resurrection of Christ, we can be reconciled to the One we’ve defied. We who were once enemies can be brought under God's protective wing—not because we have earned His love but because He has granted it.
As children enter our world, we have the privilege of giving them a taste of that same type of love and security. We get to show them the safety of the gospel by the way we protect and care for them. As we feed, rock, snuggle, and sing to them, we are showing them a love that is unconditional, rather than earned. Well before they can understand the propositions of the gospel, they can experience a small taste of what it promises.
We call this first waypost “Incubate,” knowing that seeing your child in an incubator is an unsettling and fear-inducing experience. It exposes your inability to save them on your own, but that is precisely what we need to remember as our children enter this world. We may be able to spare our children from hunger or violence, but we can not spare them from death or hell. If our children are to make it down this trail and arrive in Christ’s presence at the end, it will be because God has saved them, not because we have protected them.
Important Scriptures:
Psalm 91:1-6
Psalm 103:13-14
Matthew 6:25-34
Romans 8:31-39
Ephesians 1:3-14
Waypost 2: Instruct
The need of the gospel
There are some truths that young ears should not hear—things that are too heavy for them to bear. Is the news of their sinfulness one of them? There are many in today’s world who think children should be shielded from the reality of their sinfulness. They think it may traumatize children, doing irreparable damage.
While there certainly are some wrong ways to teach a child about sin, parents have a responsibility to help children understand their need of the gospel. If children do not understand that they are sinners in need of forgiveness, they will never understand the significance of Christ, His cross, and His resurrection.
In the toddler and pre-school years, parents must embrace their role as “proxy authorities” who establish expectations of their children on God’s behalf. Those expectations should be biblical and clear, pointing them to the paths in which God calls us to walk. And when their children inevitably disobey, following the sinful inclinations of their hearts, parents have a responsibility to lovingly discipline them.
In those moments of discipline, we must remember to have love as our motive and love in our method. We are to discipline, not punish. Our aim should not be mere compliance to us but repentance toward God. We would be wise to remember how the Lord disciplines His children and seek to embody that same posture toward ours.
As we raise our children “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord,” may we pray that he softens their hearts, breaking the hard ground so that the seed of the gospel can take root.
Important Scriptures:
Proverbs 3:1-12
Romans 3:19-20
Galatians 3:23-24
Ephesians 6:4
Hebrews 12:11
Waypost 3: Inform
The story of the gospel
Author N.D. Wilson hosts a podcast with an intriguing title and a challenging tagline. “Stories are Soul Food: What Are You Feeding Your Children?”
He’s trying to communicate something that we all know to be true in experience. Just as bread, water, and milk build up our bodies, stories build up our souls. And while food passes through our bodies, stories stick. They penetrate into the depths of our being, shaping what type of people we want to be and what type of world we want to live in.
As children enter the grade school years, they become story-devouring creatures. It is vital that we feed them the story of Scripture—the story God is authoring and in which they themselves are characters. We have the privilege and responsibility of helping them become “acquainted with the sacred writings,” getting the story of the gospel into their hearts. As they are taught the Scriptures (whether around the dinner table, in the church sanctuary, or in a classroom), those words will “make them wise for salvation by faith in Christ Jesus.” They will learn to see Christ as the center of their story instead of themselves.
Of course, if we are not loving the Scriptures ourselves, it will be difficult to persuade our children to. So, make the “eating” of God’s Word a priority in your own life, and then invite your children into it. Develop a game plan of how and when you can read with them. Get them in contexts where other believers in the church can teach them too.
Hollywood won’t wait to tell our children stories. Thankfully, we have a better one to tell—one that they could never dream up themselves!
Important Scriptures:
Psalm 119:105
2 Timothy 3:14-17
Luke 24:25-27
John 5:39-40
Waypost 4: Internalization
The truth of the gospel
In the Jewish tradition, they have bar mitzvahs for boys and bat mitzvahs for girls—ceremonies at which they become a “son (or daughter) of commandment.” From that point on, they are recognized as full-fledged members of the spiritual community. This type of “coming of age” ritual is common across religions and cultures because, as children enter adolescence, a great change is taking place.
For middle schoolers, it is vital that we help them learn to believe the truth of the gospel, not merely because their parents have told them to but because they sincerely believe it on their own. Being born into a Christian family means nothing in eternity; they must be born again to enter the family of God.
One helpful biblical story to illustrate this internalization is the story of Samuel. He had grown up around the temple of God, the priest of God, and the ark of God. He had even ministered. Yet He did not know God (1 Sam. 3:7). But God called Samuel as he became older, and Samuel called upon God in faith.
In these pivotal, often volatile, years of a child’s life, we must be praying for their conversion, not merely compliance. We must ask God to breathe life into them, and we must lovingly, patiently call upon our children to repent of their sins and place their trust in Christ. We should help them see the truthfulness of Scripture and the strength of a Christian worldview. More than that, we should point them to the person of Christ. They must rest their soul on Him.
And, as God answers our prayers, we should call our children to identify with Christ in baptism. Baptisms are far better than bar mitzvahs, because they celebrate the giving of spiritual life, not just the milestone of a birthday.
Important Scriptures:
1 Samuel 3:1-10
John 3:1-14
Romans 10:11-17
James 1:21
Waypost 5: Identity
The centrality of the gospel
If you read any book on adolescent development, you will find the word “identity” laced throughout it. As teenagers move toward adulthood, they are told they must “explore,” “forge,” and “establish” their identity. They are struggling to answer to the simple question: Who am I?
In these years of middle adolescence (early high school), we have the privilege of teaching our children the centrality of the gospel. In these years, if they have placed their faith in Christ, we must help them see that the gospel is not just something they believe to get them into heaven someday; it’s a message that should be central to who they are and how they live every day.
The concept of “union with Christ” is one that we must return to with young believers over and over again. They must learn to see themselves as being united with Christ—so deeply and permanently tied to Him by faith that the apostle Paul can say they have already died and been raised with their Savior. This is their core identity, the one that lies beneath and rises above all others. They will be tempted to find their identity in their grades, their music, their clothes, their friends, their appearance and countless other places. But, as Tim Keller says, “identity apart from God is inherently unstable.”
We must regularly remind them that they are united with Christ. Their standing with God is secure, and they are called to live as if they are united with Christ. Knowing who they are is essential for living as they ought. As we teach them to follow after Christ, we must remind them regularly of who they are—or as Pastor Larry says, whose they are.
Important Scriptures:
2 Corinthians 5:17
Ephesians 2:1-10
Galatians 4:1-7
Colossians 3:1-4
1 John 3:1-3
Waypost 6: Interdependence
The life of the gospel
Though believing children are full members of God’s family from the moment they place their faith in Christ, the privileges and responsibilities of being a member of the body become more crystalized as they near adulthood. As parents and those discipling believing teenagers, it’s important for us as they reach this stage of late adolescence (late high school) to teach them the life of the gospel.
In a few of his letters, the apostle Paul used the metaphor of a human body to describe the church. Recalling that metaphor, it is important for us to teach young men and women that if they are linked with Christ by faith, they are to be linked to His church. We should help them learn to value service of the body, encouraging them to be involved in various ministries of our local church. And as they serve, we should help them identify the gifts that God has given them for the upbuilding of other believers.
While this is an age at which many young people are spreading their wings, becoming their own person, and flaunting their independence, we must call them to humble interdependence. They have outgrown their need for diapers, training wheels, and babysitters, but they will never outgrow their need for other Christians. Until the day they die or Christ returns, they must stay on this trail with the people of God.
We need them. They need us. We all need Christ. As one song we sing says, “from life’s first cry to final breath, Jesus commands our destiny.”
Important Scriptures:
1 Corinthians 12:1-31
Ephesians 4:1-16
Hebrews 10:23-25
1 Peter 4:10-11